Conservation Advice in a Red State

As seen in an Emory University bathroom:

Do Not Eat at This Restaurant

Last night we ate at Los Loros, which turned out to be not only the worst Mexican restaurant in Atlanta, but possibly the worst restaurant in the world. My chile relleno was actually a slice of bell pepper covered in ground beef and what I believe was warmed Cheez Whiz. I still feel queasy.

But the place was packed! I was confounded. Why would the restaurant owners make such disguising food, and why would people buy it? Granted, most of the people there were also drunk, but still...

Of course, I've developed a (completely baseless) theory. Eating bad food is nostalgic for Americans. Eating a bell pepper and Cheez Whiz did remind me of my childhood, a simpler time when corn dogs were yummy and American cheese was considered... cheese. Until I was in college, my country was one in which ketchup was the only condiment, where Thai food was unknown, and where our food was marketed as 'cutting edge' rather than, well, tasty. Then along came Grey Poupon, with its uppity commercials that suggested that fancy was good, and Americans began to reevaluate what they wanted out of a meal. We wanted wine that didn't come out of a box, and beer that didn't taste like pee-pee. Now a days, if your a liberal, you never have to eat Cheese Whiz again - there are other options.

Unless, of course, you go to Los Loros. Then Cheese Whiz it is!

Will The Credit Crunch Steal Christmas?

Speaking of Grinch's stealing Christmas, shoppers are spending less this year, just one example from a pile of economic indicators to turn south over these last few months. Does this mean no Wii for me? With oil prices on the ups, will I be asking Santa for coal this season?

So, let's exchange our amateur philosopher's armchair for our amateur economist's ring cushion.

After the dot-com bust and 9/11, the Bush economic strategy was to flood the markets with money (while giving lip service to strong dollar policies!). This was done through tax cuts, and rock bottom interest rates. All that cheap money helped consumer confidence as well as corporate profits, but failed to create jobs or increase wages.

Now we're on the brink of a new bust with the housing bubble, brought on by those same low interest rates, and complicated by an unregulated market for exotic loans. This has been covered for more then a year by that NYT Casandra Paul Krugman.

Will this dampen the holiday spirit? My guess is not much. The American will to shop is much, much stronger then their fear of debt, and I don't feel good about this either. A little caution, even better, an investment in precious metal commodities, seems like a good idea.

We're really in uncharted territory here, but it looks to me like the perfect storm.

We'll just have to wait and see if the economic fallout reaches the North Pole.

Who's Stealing Christmas This Year?

According to the NYT Fashion and Style section, it's the environmentalists who are anti-Christmas now. Yup, the conscientious are preachy proselytizers who give bad presents!

The holidays have always been an emotionally combustible time for families... But in recent years, a new figure has joined the celebration, to complicate the proceedings even further: the green evangelist of the family — the impassioned activist bent on eradicating the wasteful materialism of the holidays.

Otherwise known, at least to skeptical traditionalists, as the new Grinch...

The question that an increasing number of families face is whether the proselytizing green member of the clan adds spice to the proceeding, like, say, a cup of whiskey in a bowl of eggnog, or an explosive element, like that same cup of whiskey tossed into the fire on Christmas morning.

Nice bully tactics from the NYT (albeit the Style Section): don't be an environmentalist, or your family won't love you.

Out All Night

Last night we went to "Go All Night" at the High Museum of Art. Basically, the museum was open until 2 am and we were allowed to get liquored-up while ogling antiquities. We felt really classy.

I really enjoyed both The Louvre and the Ancient World and The Eye of Josephine exhibitions. I was actually surprised at how little decorating taste have changed over the last 3,000 years. If Crate and Barrel were to market to the ancient Greeks, they would have very few changes to make to this season's catalog - just the replacement of a few light bulbs with oil lamps and voila!

The Inspiring Impressionism exhibition, however, was a bit thin. And the choreographed Latin dancing was just ridiculous. New Rule: Jazz hands should be illegal for anyone over the age of 12.

Who Knew?

We are in the midst of a worldwide helium shortage.

Seriously.

And there is such a thing as the Federal Helium Reserve in Amarillo, Texas.

I had no idea.

The Lie Log

How many lies do you tell in a day? What do those lies say about you?

What are the lies that we have in common? What do the lies we share tell us? What do they tell us about what we want to believe, and what it takes to make us believe it?

Casmall and I intend to start keeping lie logs, a record of all the lies we tell each day. We want to know what lies you are telling too. Just share the 'white lies;' if you did something illegal or truly mean-spirited we don't want to know about it.

I'll start... well, just as soon as I tell a lie I will. It won't be long, I'm not a very honest person.

The Founding

I declare The Journal of Modern Armchair Philosophies open for business (because some of you don't want to talk about lady things).